From gym advice to shopping choices, wives tell IWP the questions their husbands ask that leave them wondering, 'Did you really just ask me that?'
10 questions husbands ask that annoy wives
Most married couples I know have mastered the art of playing dumb just to keep the peace.
But then, there are days husbands ask the most inane questions.
'Why can't I find my keys?'
'Why are you buying this same coloured pair of shoes when you haven't worn the last one I gifted you?'
'Why are you angry all the time?'
In case you think this is a personal rant, IWP urges you to read Part 1 HERE.
As a follow-up, I spoke to married women across India to find out the most annoying questions husbands ask them repeatedly -- and expect them to answer with a straight face.
1. 'What are you cooking for breakfast/lunch/dinner?'
This one annoys working women the most. After a gruelling day at work, most women would like to relax, wake up late on a Sunday and be offered a hot cup of chai without having to ask for it.
But the harsh reality for some women is that "even before finishing their meal, my husband and kids want to know what I am cooking for lunch/dinner or breakfast tomorrow," complains *Vinita, who works at a bank.
2. 'Can you try losing some weight?'
'Why don't you try yoga?'
'How about joining a gym?'
'You have become very lazy, you are ignoring your health. You should try to lose some weight.'
Husbands often don't hesitate to tell their wives that they are gaining weight or are out of shape. But no matter how genuine or concerned their intention is, the outcome always ends up damaging the wife's self-esteem.
"I don't know if it's just my husband but in any situation/conflict -- health, fashion or otherwise -- my husband will randomly advise me to lose weight as if I have not tried or I am not making an effort.
"The fact that men are so insensitive to women's hormones or changing bodies is what annoys me the most.
"Sometimes, he gives me examples of other women in the family to inspire me... Honestly, as far as I am concerned, it does just the opposite," says *Neha, a working mother of two kids, aged 10 and six.
3. 'Why are you watching this awful show?'
"Most women may hate to admit this but nine out of 10 women watch daily soaps and reality shows for two reasons -- gossip and outfit/fashion inspiration," says 45-year-old housewife and mum of two teens, *Mitali, who is a huge fan of vamp characters like Komolika and Ramola played by actors Urvashi Dholakia and Sudha Chandran respectively.
"My friends and I have held kitty parties around the characters we watch on TV.
"We follow every episode of Bigg Boss, Khatron Ke Khiladi, Splitsvilla... sometimes it's the contestant; sometimes it's the clothes and makeup.
"Earlier my husband used to tease me. Then I caught him secretly watching one of the reels on Instagram.
"Honestly, I think men too enjoy these shows. They just don't want to admit it because of their male ego."
4. 'How many more clothes will you buy?'
"Women love to shop. It's a universally accepted truth," says *Bharti, a former model who gave up her career after she became pregnant as she wanted to focus on raising her family.
"Whether she is buying something she loves using her hard earned money or yours, you have no right to ask a woman why she is spending on herself.
"Your wife may not wear it the whole year or the next year but there is no need to mock her for it. I don't complain or keep score about how many beers you buy for your friends and colleagues who never show up for you.
"Sometimes the idea of choosing something she loves may make her feel loved."
5. 'Kitna time lagega?'
"Though I have told him already I will be there in 20 minutes, my husband will still call me every five minutes and ask for an update," says *Prisha, who has been married for four years.
6. 'Why can't you cook like my mom?'
"Agar maa se itna pyaar tha to shaadi nahi karni chahiye thi (If you love your mother so much, you shouldn't have got married)," snaps *Vimla, who dated her husband before they married nine years ago.
"Aur agar kar bhi liya to samajh jao ki maa aur biwi dono alag hain, copy-paste nahi (And if you did get married, you need to understand that your mother and wife are two different people; one is not a photocopy of the other)."
Like Vimla, most wives are annoyed when their husbands compare their cooking to their mother's or expect them to learn to cook from their mothers-in-law.
7. 'Where have you kept this?'
'Can you find my socks/keys/earphones?'
Women get annoyed when men carelessly leave their daily belongings around and expect their wives to keep track of them.
"In eight years of marriage, I must have shown my husband and kids at least a hundred times where to find their ties and socks.
"My kids have learned to be independent.
"Still, at 7.15 am, when I am in the middle of packing four lunches, my husband will scream at least three times from the living room instead of opening the wardrobe in the bedroom and finding what he needs himself.
"His excuse? He's getting late so it is somehow my fault that I am too organised," complains *Radhika.
8. 'Why are you angry all the time?'
"There is a reason people say it takes a village to raise a child," says *Anupriya, who has been living with her in-laws for 12 years.
"But, according to my husband, all I do is wake up and scream at my kids and fight with him and my mother-in-law.
"Sometimes, I feel if I am so good and consistent at being angry, I should be rewarded for it," she jokes while explaining why husbands need to understand the source of the anger and resolve it, rather than mock their wives for being vulnerable.
"We also want to be cheerful and positive all day but how are you helping us?" she asks.
9. 'Then what did you do all day?'
According to *Vimla, "Husbands have only two versions of an Indian wife -- either she is the aagyakari bahu (obedient daughter-in-law) who listens to the husband, serves her in-laws and takes care of the family without any tantrums or she is simply lazy and likes to waste her time and her husband's money."
Vimla says she gets riled up when her husband attempts to belittle her by asking what she did all day instead of appreciating and acknowledging her hard work or helping her finish the chores.
10. 'Can we talk about this later?'
This is a classic escape route men take instead of having that uncomfortable discussion that has long been ignored.
"After three years of dating and 13 years of being married, I can safely confirm that there is no perfect time or place to have that difficult conversation you want to.
"It could be about his parents, friends, money, an awkward situation, a conflict... he will always suggest we postpone it for another day," says Anagha, who reluctantly agreed to move in with her in-laws a year after her marriage.
Sharing her own example, she says, "It's been over 12 years... I am still waiting for my husband to talk to his parents about shifting the mandir (temple) from the kitchen to the living room."
11. 'Why do you always have to support your parents?'
For Samiksha, who is the mother of a three year old, it's about simple parenting decisions and the conflict she faces.
"It's particularly difficult when it comes to decisions regarding raising our daughter.
"We've had some pretty intense arguments about this in the past couple of years and while we've resolved them, the underlying tussle never completely goes away.
"I often find myself playing umpire between my husband and my mother, trying to keep the peace and making both sides understand each other.
"Somehow, in the process, I end up being the bad person with both of them.
"It's exhausting," she says.
